#3

I'm in love with my best friend.
I fell in love with him,
A little too hard.
He is everything to me.
He is my best friend,
Partner in crime,
Problem solver,
Care taker,
Other half,
And most importantly,
He is my soul mate.

I have never felt this blessed to have someone in my life after so long. I have found the man of my dreams. The man I want to spend my life with in the future; together forever. I've been totally happy ever since I met him. Never this happy in my entire life. What makes him so special? Why did I choose him? What has he done for me that made me fall so hard? What's different about him? Why is he the one for me?
This is my story:

I was never the happy girl you would normally encounter. I'm depressed and suicidal most of the time. I'm broken and I used to think I can never be fixed ever again. That is, until I met him. How did we meet? Well, he is an archer. One day, he had an archery competition in my school. Coincidentally, I had some business to be done so I bumped into him. We started talking and for some reason, I just had to take a picture with him so I did. And we started talking on twitter via direct message. At first, I found him really annoying and he was such a jerk, playing hard to get and all. I couldn't care less so I distant myself from him because he was being so annoying. I was at the point where I would thank God whenever he has to do something like eat or bath because I'm glad I don't have to reply to that jerk. One day, he asked for my number because it's always more convenient to whatsapp each other so I did, despite the fact that I know I would get super annoyed by him. I ignored that fact and gave him my number. So we started whatsapp-ing each other. He was still playing hard to get and I was playing Miss I Don't Care. He mentioned something about meeting again and I thought to myself, "Hell no girl, you are not meeting that jerk. Don't even think about agreeing" but I was never good at listening to my own words so I told him, "Yeah sure, why not?". Pfft why not? Because he was a pain in the ass, that's why! Anyway, we proceeded our whatsapp conversations to a skype call just for the sake of seeing his beautiful face. We started chatting on whatsapp all day and all night. His blood has a little Arab mixed in it so I learnt speaking a little bit in Arabic from him. One day, he called me "habibti" which meant my love in Arabic. I was flattered. I also called him "habibi" which meant my love for male in Arabic too. Feelings bud and it was magical. He was humorous and knows me well for someone who just met me for a few weeks. He has eyes of an angel, I swear. After weeks of skyping and whatsapp-ing, we finally had a meet up. And then feelings grew bigger as he stares into my eyes deeper. We skyped almost everyday for hours. We meet more often and we talk about feelings a lot. One day while we were skyping, I called him "baby" when we were saying our goodbyes and he called me "sayangku" which caught me immediately. Ever since, we dissed "habibti" and "habibi" and went full relationship mode. The twist is that we are not in one. We're best friends, forever. He listens to me cry and he gives me great advices about life. He asked me to be his girlfriend twice but unfortunately, I rejected him both times. I cannot bear the vision of my life without him. I can live without him, I just choose not to. I love the life I have being his best friend and I cannot ask for anything better. He has been the best for me and I don't want to jeopardize our friendship by being in a relationship. I need him to be happy again. I need my other half. He is nothing like the guys I encounter on a daily basis. He is better, tenfold. He knows how to joke around with me even when I'm not in the mood to socialize with anyone. He makes me feel important as if I'm everything to him and it's like I need to be there in order for him to be happy. He finishes off my sentences before I can even say them. He reads my mind like a high-class wizard. He is my definition of perfect and I want this to last. I want him to stay with me forever. I've even met his sisters, cousins, friends, and he met mine. He comes to my house often just to help me bake or watch tv together. I have a special bond with his family and I enjoy it. Although we live quite far from each other, he puts all his effort just to see me. I want to have him for the rest of my life because what we have right now is absolutely abnormal for me. I have never been so head over heels for someone like this. Without him, I would be the saddest and most devastated girl ever. I am truly blessed to have him. Syukur, Alhamdulillah.

Ahhhhh there we go! Part 1 of my love life. That was basically the introduction. If it wasn't obvious enough, I love him. I love my man. And he will remain my man forever. I thank Allah everyday for giving me the biggest blessing next to my parents and my best friends. God gave me a man for me to love unconditionally. I will give you my all, love. You are worth it. I love you.

Sincerely,
The Abstruse Writer.

#2

I'm not like any other teenager. I don't drink, I don't get high, I don't fuck around with guys, I don't go to clubs, I don't socialize with people as much as I do on twitter compared to reality but I have absolute 0 problem with people who does. I have many friends who socialize like mad and I'm perfectly fine with it. What bothers me is that people look down on teenagers like me. Just because we don't go out the way you guys do, doesn't mean we're strange or something. I like being in my room and study. I don't eat the same amount you do. I eat less. I don't bother doing special treatments for my face. I don't go for waxing. I don't pluck my eyebrows. I don't wear make up. I like how my body is when it's natural. I would prefer going out au naturale, any day. All the things stated above would all lead to a life story I'm about to share.
Here it goes:

"I was never the pretty girl. I never caught anyone's attention. I'm not a size 0 and I don't have flawless hair. I'm basically me. A girl with fat thighs, fat tummy, fat arms, yucky hair, yucky face, yucky skin and a yucky taste in fashion. I never take care of my body the way other girls do. I don't go for intense facials or even wear make up. I wear clothes I think feels comfortable regarding the size, brand or color. But the twist to the story is that all my friends are absolutely opposite of who I am. They don't reflect me at all. They wear make up, doll up for school, hang out with countless guys, wear expensive clothes, drinks, smokes, sleeps around and any other social situation you can possibly think of. I bet you're wondering how? How can a basic girl like me make friends with super hot girls like them? And why? Why would any hot girl befriend me? Unfortunately, those questions will remain unanswered. I've been searching for an answer for years. In my opinion, they need me for my heart. Nice guys don't dig chicks like them and they need my advice to get the guys they want. Or they need me for whatever I have that they don't, which I'm still uncertain of. Anyway, they are my best friends and vice versa. The pain is not being with people that's totally opposite of me. It hurts knowing that I have the feeling of being unwanted and weird to them. For example, I've been looked down on for not plucking my eyebrows the way they do and they think I'm weird for not doing so. Is that really rational or am I simply being a vagina? Either ways, I feel like they don't need me the way I need them. I've always been the odd and absent one whenever they make outings because I'm nothing like them. I don't like going out after school and I don't like going out for movies with guys. I prefer being in my room to study or just sleep because nothing is better than the comfort of my own home. I don't have to go out and impress anyone because I don't think it's really that important. You will never understand the pain of a teenager who has best friends with absolutely opposite traits and to go through high school with them is going to be difficult but somehow I don't think I can make it without them. Although we are different, we are the same. I need them more than anything no matter how different we are."

Alright so that was the story. Just a small part of it though. I hope you get the message I'm trying to send to you. Basically, I'm different. I'm not like the girl you expect me to be and I'm not the average girl you will encounter. I can't promise you a day with laughter or smiles but I can promise you that I won't hurt you no matter what happens. I love all my friends and I love them just the way they are. Although I'm different, I like it. I like being the weird and odd girl because at least I'm myself. Be yourself and you'll be happy.

Sincerely,
The Abstruse Writer.

#1

"assumption is a disease"

Said a wise woman with 6 children to handle. Why? Why is assumption such a disease? Maybe because it gives you a bad idea of something right? Or a right idea of something wrong? Either ways, assumption is such a horrible habit it turns into a lifestyle. An awful lifestyle that could kill. Probably not physically but mentally, a definite. Assuming can be applied in many ways, such as:

SITUATION 1

You assume a person's feelings. For example, you adore a person but you bottle up your feelings into a massacre in your head. Why? Because you assume they don't like you. You think they might reject you because you're not good enough for them or they're out of your league. What happened to staying classy and honest? IT DIED. Instead of assuming one's feelings, slap yourself and ask them for the truth. There's no harm done in confessing your feelings to someone unless you start going all creepy and desperate. But that's another story. Just be polite and honest. If they like you, then they will say so. If they don't, move on. The worst they can say is no so let it go. Don't assume things because you will never know a person's true feelings until they tell you.

SITUATION 2

Assuming one's feelings and/or point of view about life. Look, not everyone looks at life the way you do. Some people are optimistic, some people are pessimistic. You cannot assume a person is happy nor sad unless they tell you their real feelings. People hide their feelings from the wrong people because society uses it against them and that's simply wrong. It's just a matter of trust issue. You cannot assume a person is happy with what they have because that's what you see not feel. A famous person can look really happy on the outside but you will never understand how they really feel on the inside. So before you start making assumptions about how they feel, be a good listener and try to understand their pain. Ask them for the truth and then you will know how they actually feel.

SITUATION 3
The worst kind of assumption is assuming the truth of a rumor. A rumor is called a rumor for a reason. It comes from an uncertain source and is spread by irresponsible people. As a person, you can either believe what you hear, hoax or not, or you can ask for the truth from the person being told about. The rational thing to do is ask for the truth instead of believing unsure matters like rumors. You will be the fault when you spread information you're uncertain of because it could ruin a person's life and you have no confirmation about such fact to be the truth or just another lie. Therefore, be safe and ask for reassurance from the rumor spreader or from the person in the rumor itself to avoid being charged as the guilty one.

I can think of many conclusion for this matter but I'm going to stick to only one which is:

"if you want to be corrupted, assume"

because you are a corrupted human being if you assume things as you like. No one likes to be assumed wrongly so don't be a hypocrite and avoid assuming things about other people. Stay clean by asking for the truth. Nothing is better than being honest. Absolutely NOTHING.

Sincerely,
The Abstruse Writer.