#12

I have put this entry under consideration probably 47 times and I have thought enough. This HAS to be expressed one way or another. I have a question for you. Define "lover" in your own ways. Is it someone that will make you happy when you're feeling neutral? Or someone that will make you laugh like you're high when you're crying your eyeballs out? I'm about to give you an explanation of how I define a "lover" and then you evaluate your partner yourselves alright? These are the little things that you have to think through before you accept ANYONE in your life. Be it as a best friend, or a significant other. Here they are.

NUMBER ONE

Making you smile is clearly an important step they have to do to win a person's heart but the real question is how they make you smile, why they make you smile, when they make you smile and how it affects them, when you smile. Firstly, how. How does your partner make you smile? By buying you flowers because you retweeted a post saying that makes a girl happy? Or by buying you expensive perfumes because they assume you don't have tons of them already? Or the best way is by using their own methods they learn from being close to you. Personal experience, he would sing this specific song, in a specific tone, and at a specific speed, because he knows that makes me smile.Why? Because he studies the little things about me. And that is very important. Okay next, why? Why do they make you smile? This can be related to my last question which is how smiling can affect their life. The only reason anyone should be making you smile is because they feel like it's crucial to see those lips curve to form a smile. When you smile, they feel like a winner. I hate using personal references but I write my blog from life experiences so I apologize. Anyway, he would usually let me win an argument and I would be the child I am, smiling from ear to ear. Little did I know he had a different intention for letting me win the argument. He told me he was winning because he gets to see my smile. I know, it's cheesy and very typical. But it's always about the little things. Lastly, when they make you smile. It's actually a very good question. I know of a relationship where the man would make her girl feel special in every way but would leave her when she's upset because he was scared of how angry she was. That is a total no no. He should be making you happy no matter how he felt. Why? Because when she's smiling, he would be happy as well. According to my grandparents, that is true love. Put this in your considering box and think about it at night when you have useless thoughts that keeps you awake at 3 am. Would you want someone who is afraid to make you happy, or someone who puts his life goals to see you smile? Think.

NUMBER TWO

We can tell how much we mean to someone by the effort they put for us. It doesn't matter if it's the effort in texting us, or meeting us. It's definitely the effort that counts. Would you really want a man who would only text you when they have nothing else to do? That obviously means they don't put you first. Why give your all to someone who gives you his least? Why give someone your time when he doesn't appreciate it and doesn't put effort to spend time on you? Life is all about making the right choices. Or, learn from the wrong ones. Being busy is one thing but if he's just chilling all day all night and only calls you before going to bed, that's not good enough for someone who constantly misses him, texts him, calls him, all day trying to get to him. He doesn't put enough effort? Dump him and find someone that would. You KNOW you deserve better. You don't have to be with him just because you love him. Some people are meant to love, but was never meant to be together. Unfortunately, I had to learn that the hard way. Being with someone means you have to feel special. He would do anything to make you smile. He settles for nothing less. That is what true happiness is. And if you're not happy in a relationship, you're just defeating the purpose of being in one in the first place. Think about priorities. If you put them first, be sure that they put you first as well. At least, second. It's all about understanding.

NUMBER THREE

Are they scared of losing you? Would they fight for you? Does he think you're the one? Vice versa? This is important. A relationship will either lead you to a horrible break up that will scar you for a long time, or it leads to a happy marriage and being in love for eternity. Now, do you think he's the one? Because if you don't, LEAVE HIM. You have absolutely no reason to be with anyone if you think you're doing it for fun. There are only two roads in a relationship. And it definitely won't go both ways. Think about it. If you're too young to think about marriage, why bother be in a relationship? Because that is where a relationship will lead you one day. Either that, or an awful break up. If you think you wouldn't want to go through the latter, I suggest you rethink your decisions. There are only two ways in a relationship and there's nothing in between. Don't waste your time thinking about marriage at such a young age. Don't be in a relationship. It's easy as that. My parents planned my future since the day I was born so I really don't have much to think about. Just need to make the right decisions and learn from the wrong ones for now. If you think you're being in a relationship because you love him, tell me this. Why would you love someone knowing you're going to marry someone else one day? I don't know, man. A relationship seems pointless if you're doing it because you think he's cute or because he swept you off your feet. Who you marry, is already determined by God. So why would you put effort on someone you don't even want to marry? Let God do His job and just have fun with life. If you think you're going to marry your lover one day, put effort. Don't say I didn't warn you.



Pretty sure that's all I have to say FOR NOW. I have so much more to point out but probably next time. This has been a great session for me to secretly rant but you people don't have to know that. I just hope you guys aren't dating the wrong people. It's always great to know you're happy with life and not have a bad night every night. Think about it, alright.

Sincerely,
The Abstruse Writer